Sunday, February 27, 2011

What's your cheer pill?

How do you deal with your lows in life? What do you do when you're full to the brim and can't deal with anymore stress pouring into you?

Do you push aside social niceties and let it all out in one big tantrum?
Do you release it all in one heart-to-heart conversation with somebody close to you? Do you try calming yourself down by writing it all on paper, or perhaps painting?
Do you listen to something soothing, or maybe play your own instrument?
Do you go out on a shopping binge and return happy and satisfied with hell loads of bags filled with new outfits?
Does it just take one stroll into the kitchen and a look into the fridge for something yummy left over from last night's dinner party?
Do you reach out for the most fictional novel on your bookshelf and dive in? Or push in the lamest movie you find into your DVD player?
Do you just need some fresh air to breathe in, maybe a walk on the beach?
Do you need renewed contact with innocence? A little chat with a two year old? Or maybe with an eighty year old to look at the big picture?
Do you resort to scrubbing and polishing your house clean of invisible dirt?
Do you go online posting emotional statuses and tweets and blogposts, and then regret it later?
Do you put yourself to sleep, a feeble attempt at escaping the reality of our world?

Do you need a reminder of God's words?
A few prostrations on your prayer mat?
A little prayer to get you through?

Or do you just do....nothing? Smother those feelings until they're silenced?

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Mrs Doubtfire

I cried till my eyes ran out of tears and shriveled.

This is the same movie I grew up on during my London days. Literally. I watched it first when I was five years at a friend's house, and then the second time they showed it on television my mother recorded it on a video tape. My week-ends consisted primarily of pushing the recorded Mrs Doubtfire tape into the player and sitting down a two metres away from the screen, on the floor, only getting up to sit on the couch when an adult entered warning me I will be blind in a few years, and then going back to my set position when they're gone.

Again and again and again. I knew each scene and each dialogue so well that I'd mouth the words with the actors, even announce the setting of the next scene to the empty living room. I knew the parts where I had to laugh, and I laughed each time. I knew the parts where I had to be worried, and I got tensed each time.. It never got boring.

But the kid watching the film at that time hadn't the faintest idea that her eighteen-year-old self will bawl her eyes out, taken aback by the connections she had ignored all this time. It is so amazing that I had turned an eye away from the fact that the story I lived on as a child was so relevant to my life. I'm a big believer that the incidents in our lives are all part of one meaningful pattern. I cannot wish that I had paid more attention, because I was as attentive to the film as any kid could possibly be. But I do wish I had extracted more from it.

Many times I yearn to be young and carefree and innocent. Released from regret and cynicism and hatred.

How would life be if we can re-wind back to whenever, and start all over again?

(On a happier note: this film is hilarious and like no other!)

Friday, February 18, 2011

The bulge on my right hand's middle finger

Although it goes against everything I've been taught and believe in, I hate to admit I belong to a group of millions of girls across the globe who are on a constant hunt for any out of the "norm" aspects of their appearances. Which sucks, because there is no norm, and the standards we weigh against are put together by machines, and we are really supposed to be thanking God that we're not deaf, blind or dumb instead.

But there still exists a 'fault' in my appearance that passes the critical examination. And that's a tiny bump on the side of my right hand's middle finger. I love it. It was born when I reached around nine years old, and continued to grow with me- the finger's result of enduring many hours of being pressed against a pen.

The bump is my wedding ring- a reminder of a commitment. No matter how busy my day, how tired I am, how elated or depressed or angry or nervous, I will never give up on sitting and putting down on paper everything that's going on in my life and all the thoughts that run around my head. Without this regular activity, I'd go insane. It is so important to me to sort out everything life's giving me in words.

In good times, I feel I owe it to my future self to narrate all the positivity I experience at that moment. I never know when I'd need it. And in bad times, I honestly can't figure out what I'm thinking if I don't write it down. My brain finds it difficult to work if my fingers aren't assisting it.

Sometimes, it comforts me when I can write it all down like it's just another novel I'm reading. And then my entire life turns into a story, and I smile to myself because I am more awake than ever to the insignificance of our tiny surreal world that will seem like only the blink of an eye one day.

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

7 things about me

Thank you to Zarina Hassem for awarding me The Stylish Blogger Award :)

I've understood there are some rules to this thing, and although I've never done anything like this before, I am by nature one of those boring people who wore the school uniform right with the sleeves buttoned and never went to bed past my parents' set bedtime. So I'm inclined to follow those rules as well.

1. Thank and link back to the person who gave me the award
2. Share seven things about myself
3. Award 15 recently discovered great bloggers
4. Contact these bloggers to tell them of their award

Seven things about myself:
-I'm rarely neutral on issues- I usually feel very strongly for or against debatable topics. And I take care not bringing up issues I'm too passionate about in real-life, because I can get carried away.... As for this cyber-world, what's the blog for if I can't freely express ideas without the fear of hurting anyone? ;)

-I have never had the following edibles: tea and prawns.
[Edited: Okay, that was a lie. I did happen to accidently eat a prawn once while mistaking a prawn-pizza for a vegetarian one. (Hunger blinds). That moment of a slobby, unfamiliar taste in my mouth was enough to leave me traumatized for the rest of the day. And I've drank cold tea once, but it was just a sip, so that doesn't count.

-I feel guilty whenever I use the internet. Like I am not making use of time or doing something I shouldn't be doing. Even though I am productive many times online. But I think this is a feeling that stems from my childhood which I can't rid myself of: my father used to limit the time I'm allowed online to an hour a week. He had a note-pad where he made us record the amount of time we spent. It was a pretty organised system actually- you would've been impressed. There were tables for the date, time-length and reasons used. We didn't always have to fill in the 'Reason' table but it was always an additional credit to put in 'Homework research' rather than 'Chatting on MSN with my friends.'

-I am always eating. And I am always the same weight. :D

-I am the most chicken girl that exists on the face of this planet: I have never ridden a roller-coaster that goes upside down. And you don't want to be in a room with me and an insect. (See) And I also get scared when people around me climb ladders or have energy drinks.

-My parents never pressurized me to study at school. When exam-time came around, other parents made their kids extra sandwiches, stopped them from watching television or going outside. At my home, exam-time didn't mean anything. I still had to do the same chores and I was still allowed to live the same life. I think that's what made me cared so much about my grades. I love my parents for making me feel responsible for my own results. I don't get nervous about exams. In fact, I enjoy them (!) (See)

-Last, but not least: I love all my fellow bloggers: they're the special sort of friends who have no expectations, who you know nothing about, yet you share this one thing in common- the desire to write! We bloggers are humans of the same genre- the kind that find relief through words. I honestly think there are no bad or good writers. (Not trying to come up with one of those cliched phrases) What we type here is a product of our thoughts- and how can thoughts be classified as good or bad?

The third rule says I'm supposed to award fifteen recently-discovered bloggers, but I'm going to tweak around this abit and just award the blogs I find that look stylish (according to my taste), regardless of when I discovered them:

You guys don't have to follow the rules, by the way!

1- The Restless Quill

2- ..Whispers of a hijabi..

3- BoogieMonsterMan

4- Bubblez Island

5- Dear Little Auntie [although I liked your previous design better!]

6- Femme Fatale

7- Finding Guidance

8- Fog el Nakhal

9- Formal & Antiquated

10- drinking raindrops

11- I, Muslimah

12- New Inspirations

13- On The Kip (Very simple- I like the banner on top: random and suits the content!)

14- Other Oman

15- vanilla ice-cream floats

Happy blogging, everyone...

Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Beginning

When the sun rises today, she smiles down at those eighty million people on the earth that made us proud and heaves a huge sigh of relief.

Victory comes to them because to each of them, the love of their nation is their top priority. Because they set aside their religious and personal differences. Because they focus on their common goal. That is why those millions managed to free themselves without a leader or plan. When the hearts are grudge-free and the intentions pure, everything is possible.

All I can hope for is that the historic moment we had the pleasure to witness was not merely an incident in Egyptian history. Let it mark the beginning of an era filled with justice.

No longer must we be ruled by dictators blinded in their self-interests. In time, they must all fall. No longer must we silently live through humiliation and watch our brothers and sisters in distress. No longer are we slaves to our enemies.

From now on, the civilizations that taught the world how to read and write will re-gain their pride. They will forget the differences that divide us. They will remind us all the sweetness of unity.

They will break away from their chains and lead us all back to what we were.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Egyptian Koshary

Since we've been feeling very Egyptian these days, we went out for dinner last night at an Egyptian Place called 'Abu Shakra'. Dubai is really the best place to be at this time of the year...the weather is perfect: just a slight breeze, enough to cool your skin but nothing more :)

So it was the first time I tried Koshary. It really didn't look appetizing. A mixture of rice, lentils, chickpeas and macaroni. Honestly, it looked like they've just mixed up the most random things they could get their hands on. But being Iraqi, I told myself I should know better than to judge a dish by its appearance.

I loved it!

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